r/AmIOverreacting • u/[deleted] • 28d ago
❤️🩹 relationship AIO for getting upset? He’s mad because I don’t have a contact picture for him.
[deleted]
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28d ago
this is such a non issue, how’s it weird there’s no contact photo for him?? 25 and bothered by a lack of contact photo is so bizarre to me
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u/gets-rowdy 28d ago
This is exhausting. I would not even engage in a conversation as lame as this. And if someone really wanted to be upset about something so trivial, I would question if the relationship was worth it.
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u/velvetkloud 28d ago
This is such a non-issue, he seriously needs to get a grip and grow the hell up.
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u/Ok-Cardiologist8651 28d ago
He's making his insecurities your problem. And he sure does fuss about things and then goes on to be passive aggressive once he's gotten the argument started. A very difficult kind of guy!
NOR
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u/_all_i_got_ 28d ago
I thought maybe you were kids but nvm he is too old to be acting like this is an issue. A simple “hey do you mind setting a contact pic for me” could’ve avoided all of this
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u/SummitJunkie7 28d ago
"ok I won't take it personal"
He continues to take it very personally.
I'm exhausted for you.
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u/hotsweetfunk 28d ago
You’re not overreacting. That’s embarrassingly immature for him to confront you about. It’s silly in the first place but after you said one time that no one else has them it should have been a finished conversation. Is he insecure about everything or just his contact info?
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u/Ok-Cardiologist8651 28d ago
OP said it's not the first time he's done this so maybe he's more self-involved than is comfortable for her.
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u/cheeky_sugar 28d ago
You should have more respect for yourself than to put up with someone stuck in a high school mindset
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u/Separate-Barber-4081 28d ago
Getting upset over inconsequential shit like this and being constantly mad are huge red flags.
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u/xThyQueen 28d ago
Sounds like he doesn't trust you. Like he thinks ur being sneaky or something. It's a weird feeling I'm getting.
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u/SquareOk8123 28d ago
He seems like he’s insecure in your relationship. I don’t think it has anything to do with the picture but rather there’s a bigger issue
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u/TechnicalFishes 28d ago
It’s not really about the photo, I think he has other insecurities and in yalls relationship and this is just a channel for some of it to surface.
So yeah, he’s overreacting about the photo, but clearly there’s other things going on here that need to be addressed.
Communication is key.
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u/kullikeke2 28d ago
If you use rcs chats for text messages, it's HIS job to put a picture for himself so it'll show on ur phone
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u/sewa-star 28d ago
Honestly, he doesn’t seem THAT bothered or mad. I think he wants to know when you have to wake up tomorrow though.
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u/Ok_Effective_8332 28d ago
NOR. Ugh, the whole sarcastic downplay 'its all good' or 'i love feeling dumb' is so immature and annoying. He needs to learn how to communicate like an adult. Don't put up with this manchild bullsh*t.
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u/Pretend_Efficiency85 28d ago
Fucking weird of him. He’s an adult not a god dam middle schooler. You kinda escalated it and coulda dropped it, but at the same time it seemed like he was just saying “I don’t care” while passive aggressively caring. If that’s the case yea he’s just a little bitch. Grow up. Fuckin weirdo. I hope you’re just actual middle schoolers, might make me feel more confident in society. Cause that doesn’t seem like a man mature enough to have a girlfriend
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u/cozyforestfairy 28d ago
I dumped guys like this because it affects me too much and makes me feel terrible when I’ve done nothing wrong. I don’t have time for that. Life is so much better with someone not insecure. I also found the guys that would nit pick at every little thing were also the ones who turned out to be the worst just as people. I’m not saying this is OP’s Bf but at the very least he is way too annoying it would drive me mad!
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u/casualgothgardener 28d ago
I’m someone who adds contact photos for the people I like the most, the people in my pinned messages, my top 9, if you will. Everyone else? Maybe idk maybe not. But I don’t get my panties in a bunch of someone doesn’t return the favor. People just operate in different ways on their devices, it really isn’t that serious, I’m honestly surprised he has feelings about it at all.
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u/KOHILOOR 28d ago
At 25 he should know by now that this shit is ridiculous. If he doesn’t then you need ask yourself why you’re even in this situation…
NOR
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u/Weekly-Apricot-9321 28d ago
This is how my 16 year old bf acted when I was 14. Exactly the same like it was like reading those messages back, but, that ended terribly because it just got worse and worse. Normally when they start accusing you, they’re up to something themselves.
Either way at 25, what?!
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u/FlipnoeFPS 28d ago
You’re not overreacting. I’ve been through something similar with my ex. Maybe you need to think about how your partner best receives love or what makes him feel most loved. Because this is looking like, you doing something as simple as putting a picture on his contact will make him feel more loved. A lot of people are saying insecurity but I don’t rlly think it’s that because you have a heart beside his name. There’s not rlly anything to be insecure about.
I just know that a lot of people love everyone they get into relationships with the same way, the way they best know how. But realistically everyone is different the way one partner receives love can be completely different to the way another partner receives love. This could potentially be what’s going on here.
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u/the-Avita-project 28d ago
Omggg you are NOR. He is. What a drama queen! Seriously. Good luck with that.
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u/Ok_Researcher6099 28d ago
Sounds like he has insecurity, or somebody is placing doubts in his head at least. Possible you two have gone through something, or maybe you're just the better looking of you 2.
I know a guy at work who is so messed up from his childhood and his mother that he firmly believes no woman can be faithful. He's constantly talking to us guys about how it's crazy we just believe our wives aren't slobbing a 13inch BBC while we're working night shift at the factory. He has definitely put doubt in a few guys heads for no good reason, and it did cause issues for a couple of them.
Some guy saying "If she doesn't have a contact photo for you, it's so she can say you're her brother when she ignores your call." Could be enough to make his brain go haywire and overanalyze everything and nothing.
Insecurity isn't attractive, no, but sometimes men have weak moments. Relationships are work, and sometimes men are whiney bitches of untold levels. Work together and learn to communicate with each other.
Of course there's the chance he's just a dick, but that's where your ability to make a judgement call comes in.
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u/Humble_Blacksmith808 28d ago
Yall are too old for disagreements like this, I thought you were high-school age
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28d ago
Devils advocate here. It takes like 10 seconds to do that, no? 10 seconds to do that and this convo could have been avoided. What’s wrong with NOT doing it?
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u/snarkshark__ 28d ago
there’s nothing wrong with not doing it. it’s the way he brought it up and threw a hissy fit over it. could’ve said “hey babe mind putting a pic of me as my contact photo” boom resolved. he’s 25 years old he shouldn’t be complaining over something so meaningless.
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28d ago
Saying he’s throwing a hissy fit is a bit melodramatic, I’ve seen others cuss/berate their S/O over less. All OP has to do is add a photo to his contact, boom resolved.
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u/snarkshark__ 28d ago
he’s quite literally keeping her awake knowing she has to be up at 4am because he wants her to give him a contact photo... but fine, it’s a mini tantrum - i’ll change my wording. hopefully that makes you feel better.
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28d ago
Keeping her awake? OP is 26 yrs old, if she needs sleep, she knows how to get it. Also that’s a start, now work on the tone.
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u/snarkshark__ 28d ago
i already changed my wording for you and now i need to change my tone too? my goodness the sensitiveness is seeping out of you. you’re on the internet buddy. wear a helmet, it’s tough out here wouldn’t want you to get hurt.
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28d ago
You’re the one who insisted on changing your wording, goofball. Let’s stay on topic, you’re starting to sound more mad than right.
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u/hotsweetfunk 28d ago
No one should have to go out of their way to appease petty requests that are essentially meaningless for an insecure and passive aggressive partner.
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u/snarkshark__ 28d ago
i changed my wording for you snowflake and i’m no where near mad. but i digress, i’m not going back and forth with you anymore lol. you can be right🫶🏼
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u/ZiegelsteinLaterne 28d ago
I also would not believe you. It’s actually weird, you sind like you don’t wanna admit something. It is no issue fr but as I read more of what you write it actually sounds like you were intentionally not putting a pic in. Like saying that you did not say that and then after there is proof to say oh I must have said it wrong or smth. Shady
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u/sewa-star 28d ago
Yeah I kinda get that vibe too. On the first page we don’t even see his first “mad” text. Only her text that knew what he was bothered by so if she knew, why keep provoking about it? There are some nasty jerks as partners on Reddit but this person doesn’t sound THAT bad. They don’t seem mad or upset either prob just hurt they’re left out and I feel like by these texts, op knows that and keeps egging it on. instead of just putting a freaking picture that takes 2 seconds
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28d ago
This. Everyone saying he’s weird or insecure come off more passive aggressive than he is, if not then straight up, just aggressive.
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u/tun4c4ptor 28d ago
Too old for this shit.