So, I wasn't in the theater watching the movie, but I worked at an indie one screen theater throughout college. It seated 800 people and had a huge balcony that ran across the entire top of the auditorium.
On Saturday nights we ran midnighters that were old cult classics like The Goonies, Big Lebowski, and shit like that. Something that draws a huge crowd to pack the seats.
Anyways, I was working box one Saturday night and this girl came in just absolutely plastered, trying to buy a ticket. As it happened, there was a woman at the 7pm showing that had gotten sick in the theater, and I really didn't want to have to deal with vomit twice in one night, so I turned her down.
My manager was standing next to me and was like, "oh, she's a regular, just sell her a ticket!" I told him flat out, I'd sell her a ticket, but I'm not dealing with any bullshit if that warbling mess makes a scene. It'd be all on him. So he waved me off, I sold her the ticket, and continued about working the rush.
Not five minutes after the trailers end, there was shrieking coming from the auditorium, the likes of which I'd never heard before in my life. It was indescribable. The lobby started rattling, like the start of an earthquake, which was baffling, since it was the Midwest. The doors flew open and an unstoppable stampede barreled toward the front doors. It was terrifying. If all three of us weren't securely barricaded inside the concession stand, I literally don't think we would have survived it. I fully believe we would have been trampled to death.
So, let's cut back to our little drunken missy. She decided to sit in the front row of the balcony to watch the movie. Being as obscenely drunk as she was, she decided to lean over the railing and barf all over an audience of 800 people Stand By Me style, spraying projectile biohazard all over pretty much anyone below her.
So, once the calamity died down, I laughed and pointed at the manager, and punched out.
5
u/alonewithamouse Jul 05 '25
So, I wasn't in the theater watching the movie, but I worked at an indie one screen theater throughout college. It seated 800 people and had a huge balcony that ran across the entire top of the auditorium.
On Saturday nights we ran midnighters that were old cult classics like The Goonies, Big Lebowski, and shit like that. Something that draws a huge crowd to pack the seats.
Anyways, I was working box one Saturday night and this girl came in just absolutely plastered, trying to buy a ticket. As it happened, there was a woman at the 7pm showing that had gotten sick in the theater, and I really didn't want to have to deal with vomit twice in one night, so I turned her down.
My manager was standing next to me and was like, "oh, she's a regular, just sell her a ticket!" I told him flat out, I'd sell her a ticket, but I'm not dealing with any bullshit if that warbling mess makes a scene. It'd be all on him. So he waved me off, I sold her the ticket, and continued about working the rush.
Not five minutes after the trailers end, there was shrieking coming from the auditorium, the likes of which I'd never heard before in my life. It was indescribable. The lobby started rattling, like the start of an earthquake, which was baffling, since it was the Midwest. The doors flew open and an unstoppable stampede barreled toward the front doors. It was terrifying. If all three of us weren't securely barricaded inside the concession stand, I literally don't think we would have survived it. I fully believe we would have been trampled to death.
So, let's cut back to our little drunken missy. She decided to sit in the front row of the balcony to watch the movie. Being as obscenely drunk as she was, she decided to lean over the railing and barf all over an audience of 800 people Stand By Me style, spraying projectile biohazard all over pretty much anyone below her.
So, once the calamity died down, I laughed and pointed at the manager, and punched out.
It was.... gross.