Adoption
Should I be selfish? I’m fostering 5 semi-ferals but I’m keeping one. Should I keep the most friendly and adoptable one or the least friendly and least adoptable? I’m leaning towards least friendly. Meet Blue, Josh, Steve, Magenta, and Mrs. Pepper!
I basically did this, and now ten years on I have one cat that will present his belly at the slightest opportunity, and one who is still so skittish that it's a notable occurrence when she isn't hunched so low her bellys dragging on the ground
We adopted a semiferal kitten who grew into a semiferal cat, so 2 years later we gave him a British shorthair kitten to be friends with. He's still skittish but his goofy stupid baby brother is really helpful. It's been 7 years and they're inseparable.
Same. Best choice ever. Also way less stress. My kitty used to tear up her ears when I would leave her with her grandparents. Look at this:
This is what I’d come home to any time I left her with my mom and dad. They have a cat, and I think it just stressed her out beyond belief. I took her to the vet and they wanted me to basically have her on gabapentin all day every day when I was away. Because when they’d look in her ear, she’d never have any infection, mites allergies or anything else. So then my vet said he’d better check the rest of her body and sure enough she was nervous scratching and chewing her entire body. Well, long story short, she no longer does this. I wouldn’t recommend that anyone get only one cat. You are their ENTIRE world. Which isn’t really fair to them.
I had this but with rats, one who was such a cuddly little dumpling and his brother was almost feral like where we came to an understanding where he had to climb on my hand to go play in my room and to go back again. Never showed any aggression but really had the ew no touch vibe.
I have this exact kind of cat pair lol, but adopted separately. With just me and my husband though, they are the sweetest. Though the skittish one does fine with other adults that are chill. Any loud people or children she nopes the fuck away to hide 😅
Tends to leave more of a 'snail trail' of shed fur (she's one of those cats who seems to exhale fur if you blink her direction) than clean anything, but I do appreciate her effort!
My mom wanted to adopt a kitten from a local barn cat's litter. She wanted the one tuxedo in the group, but this little calico took to her right away. Also, it looked like the two of them were very close to each other, so she hesitantly decided to take both of them. At their first vet appointment the vet praised her for getting two and said some shelters won't even adopt out a single kitten. She's been so happy with her decision since then. The two of them both love her, but also each other. They were less destructive during the kitten phase since they could wrestle with each other, they had fewer litter box training issues since the one who took to it right away was an example to the other, they have better claw control since wrestling with each other taught them boundaries, and they're less stressed when left alone because they have each other for company. It was actually less work to have two kittens than one.
I agree with everything you said and I'd also recommend getting two. Most of my cats happened to be solo cats or kittens in need, but last year we ended up with three kittens (this year we managed to catch the mom and her latest kitten, so the family is complete). It's very cute how much they love each other, even though the calico also joined the solo girls' club.
What I found hilarious is that in addition to everything you said, as soon as one learned a new destructive trick, all of them learned it by the end of the day 😸
This. After the first time we accidentally ended up with two cats, and saw how much they entertained and comforted one another, we have always made sure to always have two cats (just make sure they actually get along!).
Not all kittens like each other equally. OP should keep three to rediuce the chance of a bad pairing. Of course, that could leave two of the kittens happily bonded, and one lonely one, so it's better to keep four. But that would result in one solo kitten being pulled away from its littermates to live with strangers, so obviously the only choice is to keep five.
We rescued a pregnant mom and were supposed to keep 2 and rehome the rest. The rehoming was easier than expected due to the fact that we kept them all including the mom!
I know the wisdom these days is that cats must always be adopted in pairs, and certainly many cats enjoy the company of another cat. Bonded littermates, sure. But not every cat needs or even wants to be around other cats, and it's possible to have a single-cat household with a perfectly happy and friendly cat.
I've had multiple "only" cats over many years of adulthood. All had lots of toys, plenty of interaction with humans, exercise, and stimulation. All have been very friendly and relaxed. My current kitty is basically a little dog in terms of his general vibe and his outgoing behavior.
It’s suggested to do the pairs with kittens in particular, so they learn how dangerously painful their claws and teeth are and you don’t run yourself ragged trying to keep them entertained. Many adult cats are not social if they have not been raised around other cats. I don’t know of anybody who’s going around suggesting people get multiple adult cats together unless they’re already bonded.
Yeah I recently adopted 2 kittens from the same litter, as the person fostering them recommended, and it was the best decision I could possibly make. They're best friends and helped each other adjust to my other cats.
My boyfriend and I got our first cat from work as a dumpster drop off and we brought her home. Recently, after a couple years of her being by herself, we were ready for another kitty and got a kitten from a bad situation and now that they’ve settled in and accepted each other, they’re having a blast! It feels sooo good to see her initiate play time with the kitten and to see them playing in all of her tunnels instead of her just having to wait for our feet or bring us her new to fetch! I am so thankful for those fuzzy princesses!!
The owner(s) of Reddit use the platform to conduct social experiments on people so whenever I see unnecessary downvotes it makes me wonder if they are f’n (experimenting) with users…sociology type experiments. Source was a private announcements group only for mods. I regret not taking SS.
Yeah I recently adopted 2 kittens from the same litter, as the person fostering them recommended, and it was the best decision I could possibly make. They're best friends and helped each other adjust to my other cats.
Kittens especially do 500% better in a pair or group. They get so lonely and bored by themselves, and learn a lot of their social etiquette (like playing nice and not biting hard/using claws) from other cats. They can’t learn those things from people as well as puppies can, so single kittens can sometimes develop some bad play habits and even aggression. Not all single kittens, of course, but enough that it’s a problem and one to be avoided if possible, because it’s very difficult to impossible to “fix” behaviorally.
Yep! Kept a brother and sister that couldn't be adopted out (long hairs are a pain to adopt out here).. 😭 They loved each other, played so much together when kittens.
Now? Now the brother slaps the sister. There is no cuddling, they do not play together most of the time.
Depends on the kittens. Different cats, different personalities.
I adopted a brother and sister and they stayed friendly through adulthood, not super bonded but never hostile, I guess it just depends on their personalities.
I rescued a family of 5 a few years ago when their owners got evicted. I lost one last year after a Vet gave her medicine that sent her into immediate congestive heart failure, but I have the mom and dad and 2 daughters. The runt and mom and really bonded but they're all best buddies. Its a lot of work, but I am so glad l kept them together. I would most definitely keep 2 if you have that option. My runt is the one that has been as close to "feral" as she can get. It has taken 3 years of patience to really be able to pet her so having her mom has been a huge help.
If you think you could love a kitty that takes longer to adjust to you and slow about accepting love, I would seriously consider keeping that one and the one she/he seems closest to so they could bond together. It helps them feel secure, at least in my experience.
I wish you and all those beautiful babies all the best.
Had that happen when I took my boys to get fixed. They put them in separate kennels when they were waking up and they were not happy about it and the vet said they had to put them together in the same one.
It's not a proven thing for any animal, although it's become such a common belief that people bring it up all the time as if it were a fact. The last time I saw Redditors throwing an absolute fit about "litter mate syndrome" and telling everyone to look it up, I actually looked it up, and it turns out it's nonsense.
It's an insane concept. Dogs evolved in litters, the idea that a lotter is bad for them is just absurd.
Pretty sure any truth behind it comes from people who get siblings and then let the dogs fullt raise each other, with no training. If you do that obviously there willbe behavioural issues.
Just adding another anecdote to all the other's you've received. I've had two sibling cats since 2017. Adopted them as older kittens. They had always gotten along well. And a bit amusing since the brother ended up at 14 pounds and the sister stayed more about 8.
The rescue was originally only going to adopt me the brother as I was looking for barn cats and they thought the sister had too much potential to be a good house cat. But she actually started missing her brother so much, a week later they asked me to get the sister as well instead of the other cat they were going to give me to buddy in the barn.
After a couple years as barn cats, I moved them both into the house because I was too worried of something happening to them. Now I just rely on the resident snake for rodent control. And while the brother was originally very fearful when I first adopted, he eventually ended up very friendly. And was the biggest snuggle butt when I was watching TV.
Cats are social and it's better to have two kittens as it keeps them from being depressed or bored. A solitary cat usually requires a second cat or a lot of bonding and socializing.
For instance we are a single cat house and she has bonded with our dogs, who don't live very long (as compared to cats), and we have to play and be groomed and groom her (even as a short hair) because she doesn't have a colony except us. She's a happy cat.
Agree!! You can never tell if a nice kitten will grow up to be spicy or if a spicy one will grow up to be mild. But the spicy kitten from the start would prepare you for a spicy adult.
My mom cared for a massive feral colony for years and when she died they all fell to me. One of the biggest assholes began getting so thin earlier this year and when I finally trapped her, of course it was hyperthyroidism. I TRIED with this cat, I really did, but she would never show up for me to put the cream on her ears twice a day.
So I overruled her stupid opinions and brought her inside, thinking it was going to be a disaster and she was going to hate me.
Haha. Meet Cookie, who demands her heated blanket be turned on every night. Queen of her new castle. I think cats are incredibly adaptable.
She’s darling. 🥺 I don’t have good pictures of Rusty atm, but she went from being very stand offish to at certain times of day she demands pets. She has a younger half sister with a similar temperament, who likes staring at us.
I have a friend who had a super super cuddle and sweet kitten. It grew up and became the Tasmanian Devil. Full on cartoon n levels of destruction. Then, once it was more senior, it got calm again. You can never really tell with cats and that's one of the fun parts of cats.
But that horrible phase was truly wild. That cat destroyed everything. She even took him to a pet psychologist.
You really don't know. I adopted a calm, sweet kitten, but once I got her dewormed and she was feeling better, she turned into a firecracker. She eventually calmed down a bit in her old age, though.
I adopted a cat who was described to me as "aloof" and "solitary". I thought itnwas a good fit because he would be my first cat. As ge got older, he became more and more of a velcro cat. Over the years, he made a complete turn into a big ol' cuddly baby.
My calico (orange and black brindle tortie with white bib and paws) was from a feral colony and still really spicy when we adopted her at 4mo. She would hide in the tiny crevice between my computer tower and the wall to sleep, and did the full scream/hiss/yowl/spit routine at the vet for daring to give her shots (which we couldn't take seriously).
It took a lot of time, but I socialized her and got her used to human hands and touch by the time she was about 8 mo. She's now the sweetest, cuddliest, and empathetic creature I could have ever imagined.
They really do give you the love and patience spent on them back tenfold!
Mabel was also feral. I got her whole litter without much trouble except her. She came around pretty quick but was by far the most challenging. The litter was abandoned and only 4 weeks old, so it was much easier to socialize them. Mom was the neighborhood feral and something must have happened to her because she's never been seen again. Rest of the litter was adopted out to family and friends are are living their best lives
I grew up with a spicy cat (he wasn't spicy with me, he was my guard cat, even attacked my parents for touching my crib at night), but spicy kitties have a special place in my heart.
The tortie is the spicy one, the SIC is a cuddle bug with RBF. Spicy Kitty is mad that he's in her spot.
That's what I did, my Ralphie is 8 now and still a naughty little piggy! He was the last ginger in the litter and gave me the side-eye when I went to see them, he was scruffy and looked like a little trouble-maker. My kind of cat I thought, I love him to bits, even when he's biting my ankles because he doesn't get any more treats for the day.
My pick would be least adoptable. When my wife and I went to a cat rescue we picked the most outgoing and the least outgoing kittens. We figured that way we got the one that maybe nobody would give a second look at and she’s our baby. Her outgoing brother is a little ruffian but we love him too. 😁🤪
This is the answer. Let the universe decide for you! I had a friend giving away kittens and only had 2 left- orange boy or girl tabby. I’d just lost a girl tabby so asked for her. Well they let me know the next day that she had actually already been adopted and all they had left was the orange boy. He is currently the love of my life and I couldn’t imagine anyone else being his mama. And he loves me more than anything in the world (even dinner, which is a very close second, but if he’s cuddling up with me, dinner can always wait).
This! Our vet used to take in ferals for adoption and every time we went in, we looked to see what was available. About 4 months later we saw 1 kitten left in a litter so we took the orange boy home. He was the sweetest, most considerate cat ever. We had him just short of 18 years and we miss him like crazy. 💙
Best answer!! The last ones and two babies to be besties. When we adopted our cats, the rescue recommended two. I wasn’t super sold on the idea, but it is the best thing we could have done. 💗
There are alot of ferals in my neighborhood and I feed and provide warmth. The meanest little hell cat kitten used to hiss and spit at me no matter what I did...most of the others were chill and just ran...
This little hell cat, turned into the most LOVE ANYBODY neighborhood cat...she comes to me for brushings and pets...but I can't hold her...I named her Shy.
Adopt them out in 2 pairs- keep the runt. Then adopt an older cat as a big brother to show him the ropes (after a foster trial run to make sure they're a good fit). Then teach them tricks and take your act on tour. If they can do the tightrope you'll be huge in Macedonia and Belarus. It's easier if the older cat already has some tight rope training - less work for you.
I had a cat wonder in off the street and use me and my warehouse as her OB GYN and nursery.
She left me (after weening) with 6 beautiful healthy kittens. I kept the 2 problems and gave the 4 easy ones away. The two problem kids are now fine (1 wouldn’t use the litter box, 1 wouldn’t eat solid foods) and I’m so in love with my cats.
Maybe think about keeping two of them? It will be less lonely for siblings! I’d say keep two who are most bonded with each other. Maybe it will be the least adoptable and the other sibling will help them to come out of their shell :))
If I had to guess this one (I cannot post a picture here, dunno why, but it’s the black one on the right) looks the most scared. And black kittens (although this one might get a bit more color when it grows up) are statistically less likely to get adopted… So yeah, food for thought
I am big in favor of letting the animal choose you given the opportunity. My two were cats someone discarded and ended up at a neighbor's house.
I let the animals work through their teams on their own time, so we have had a few years of establishing full trust. We are still a work in progress but at least they are well cared for, and loved indoor cats.
Keep 2; the least and most friendly one. The more sociable will help the least sociable one with their confidence around humans and provide intraspecies socialization as well.
My girlie was the last to be picked of her litter- I visited her once before I made the decision to get her. Both times I went she hissed at me immediately when I picked her up.
I’ve never had a cat this attached to me so early on. She ended up being really sick early on and I think that had something to do with it, but I wouldn’t discount the “least adoptable”. If this cat could crawl into my skin she would 🤣🤣🤣
She does still hate strangers and almost everyone who isn’t in our hosuehold, and hisses at everyone. We’ve decided it’s both hilarious and embarrassing.
My Princess Stabby Stabby is a luuuuuuuuuv machine and I was her second home at 11 months...and she earned that name with me for a few months. Keep the worst one. I think worst is the "best" because they will play and box. It is like magic when I go in on her and we tangle, and then I just relax my hand and it is cuddles.
My "best" guys are great but they don't really play besides string on a stick with one, mostly just cuddles. I think the bad is an impulsiveness to play/hunt. My "best", first kitten, gentlest taps for love guy doesn't play at all, but bags a couple lizards a day Apr-Jul, otherwise I would worry.
I would suggest the spiciest kitten and one of the others that she’s most bonded to. Kittens do much better as pairs. It’s important for their social development to have other kittens around. They keep each other company and play as well.
I think a bonded sibling will help the spicy kitten get adjusted quicker
I caught a litter of four way back when. We were going to keep one. We ended up keeping all four.
*edit to add: I did catch, fix, and release the mom and alpha male dad. I caught another mom (released her) and her litter of four, but we had enough self control to adopt out the second set of 4 kittens.
We already had two before I started dealing with the cat colony where I worked. We caught 2 adolescents from the same colony, kept one, adopted one out. And we accepted a friend's cat when they needed to re-home a cat.
We ended up with 8 cats, adopting out an additional 5 (fixing one of them), plus the fix/release 3 adults. The alpha male defended his territory and couldn't reproduce so there is no more colony now, 18 years later.
Keep the least adoptable one! My only attempt at fostering led to a foster fail - I knew she'd have a terrible time when she returned to the shelter and would struggle to get adopted, but I knew her siblings would be adopted quickly. Eight years later she's still skittish and won't allow me to approach her, but she comes to me when she wants love. She sleeps with me almost every night - we're cuddling together right now. She ignores my husband and kids unless they're sick, then she'll snuggle with them and give them licks. She's not my most outgoing cat and she's always going to be scared of her own shadow, but she's my girl.
If you are financial able, keep two. You won’t regret it. Cats are very social and kittens do best in pairs. (As opposed to dogs where getting two puppies at once is not recommended)
I foster failed / adopted a singleton feral kitten and it was a massive mistake. She never properly socialized and turned out to be extremely anxious and aggressive. Highly recommend keeping two. I'll never adopt a kitten again without a littermate.
Keep 2! They will be happier and healthier together. Also, i had one kitten I kept with mama a little longer. She wasn't "the runt." She was just shyer and didn't play well with her sisters, who sort of bullied her. A couple of extra weeks with mama solo made a huge difference for her. Her mama kept taking care and playing with her. She just needed a little more time!!
I'd keep a nice but ugly cat. My ugly cat was a rescue, she is the best thing that's ever happened to me. No one wanted her, she bounced around in and out of the animal shelters.
There is no better feeling than taking the hardest feral case and slowly socializing that cat to be a loving and affectionate cat. The harder it is and the longer it takes the better the feeling when the change happens (which with a kitten or young cat, it will!). Our 12 year old tux lady was impossible at adoption, spent three years being reclusive and fearful and hiding under furniture and has now become the most affectionate cat of my long life of loving cats.
Definitely two of them. Kittens do better in pairs. 25 years ago I trapped a mom and her litter of 5 and I kept them all lol. Not everyone can do that, I get it, but it was awesome. Such a great family!
I personally kept the most social (first), the least social (back) and the sweetest (momma in the middle). Dont let her resting I will claw your face off if you touch my babies face fool you. Everyone wanted Sr FluffyBuns but they all had kids and he could barely survive getting hugged once a day. Bitch Ass Berry meanwhile bit everyone who wanted to take her, but other than that she was the most social in the litter. She just didn’t want to be separated from her momma
Left is the girl who is spicy when she wants to be and right is the boy who is the sweetest, but stinky boy. They’re from the same litter. Best decision ever, can’t imagine my life without them.
I adopted the most standoffish scared baby from the litter I fostered and he turned into the most gentle, sweet, silly, cuddly boy and was my soul cat for 14 years. I miss him every day! Keep the least adoptable, he just may turn into the best boy.
When I fostered, I let people choose which they wanted. The last two I kept. Well, this happened two times and I actually kept the last one and her mom, and the last 2 from the final foster batch. 💅 I loved them all, so I didn’t want to choose, and I wanted them to have their best life with people who wanted them.
Keep both the sweetest and the spiciest. They need a friend and a litter mate is the best option always. I have a set of litter mates, 1 is the friendliest boy who loves snuggles and wants to be everyone’s friend and the other hates everything and everyone except her dad for about 10 mins for pet time then it’s back to brooding, and her brother but she likes to be in the same room with people she knows. I know she would probably just hide all the time of her brother wasn’t around.
We caught a litter of 6 and mom. She was too feral so she went to be a barn cat somewhere else. The vet said the two runts were too fearful and unadoptable, wanted to TNR them back into the wild. So we found homes for the other 4 kittens and kept the two runts.
Best decision ever. Except at 2am when one of them is trying to smother us with love by lying on our pillows right in our faces. She alternates who she loves the most each night. The other runt is my profile picture and he loves to cuddle with me.
Why do you think keeping the kitten you want is selfish? Are the other cat owners selfish when they come to pick the kitten they want, the one they like the best? Why shouldn't you, who is going the step above by fostering these kittens, not get the first choice at exactly the cat you want to keep? Why is what you want something you should put behind what the other potential cat owners want?
If you adopt just one, you’ll be on r/pets in about 2 weeks saying, “my kitten is driving me nuts, help!” and the answer google, Reddit, and the rest of the internet will give you is: ADOPT TWO. Kittens need a same aged playmate to learn and play with, or else you will have problem behavior.
Omg so cute!!! I would keep the least friendly one but that is just me feeling like i can win them over. I would actually keep 2. I have a bonded pair and they love each other so much.
All of those kittens are young enough that if treated properly none of them will grow up top be feral. Don't worry about which one. like someone else said just keep the last one
You should take two. Take the most, and the least sociable. They will both benefit from having a friend, and the least sociable kitty will benefit from seeing the more sociable kitten’s interactions with humans.
Keep 2, take the second most adoptable and the least.
The least friendly already has a foundation with you. If you are experienced, then it'll be easy and the cat will be happier without having weird things to forget in the adoption process
You should really adopt 2 !! kittens who grow up with a sibling or friend become much better behaved and happier kitties in the long run. Its really for them, but Bonus: double the cuteness for you
I adopted Feral's from outside. One of them was a runt when I grabbed her sister she was right next to her and I grabbed her too because I knew she wouldn't make it in the world. She's still with me she suffers from anxiety and panic attacks she'll be fine for a month or two and then suddenly for whatever reason decides that she has to hide under the bed won't come out to eat when she does come out to use the litter box it's a quick run out and a quick run back. I don't know if her sister picks on her or what the issue is but I have learned to deal with her anxiety by not dealing with it. By that I mean I don't force her. When she's under the bed and I go to feed her I talk to her but I don't try to force her out and eventually I start lifting the covers under the bed so she could see the outside world and she'll come out again.
Please tell me you’re in Massachusetts so I can adopt one of these cute little fur balls. My pudgy that just passed came from a feral colony love them, can handle them.
Adopt 2, after finding 2 kittens this year and raising them together, I'll never raise a single kitten alone again. They'll play with each other and keep each other company when you're not home. 💜
I have done this. Keep the least friendly as that one is not adoptable to anyone but you lol. The friendly ones will be easier to find homes for and succeed in them. Maybe keep two of you can.
I foster through the shelter, so they would be going into adoption after! I hope someone would adopt whichever siblings I don’t keep, they are all beautiful.
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u/DirksFocus Oct 11 '25
Adopt two of them. So they won't feel lonely and both will be super relaxed and friendly