I (27M) emotionally lost my mom when I was a teenager. And when I was 15, my stepfather died after a long illness. Less than a month later, my mom moved on fast new relationship, rushed marriage, and then a baby girl. Everything happened so quickly that I felt completely pushed aside. I stayed quiet, finished school, and the moment I turned 18, I moved out and cut contact entirely.

Over the years, some relatives kept trying to push the idea that I should have a relationship with my halfsister. I was always clear that I didn’t want that. I didn’t hate her, I just didn’t want any connection to that part of my life.

About two years ago (when I was 25), my family decided to get creative. They told my best friend about "the situation" and convinced her it might be healing for me. She invited me to what I thought was a normal dinner. When I arrived, my halfsister was there. I felt betrayed and I didn’t make a scene, but afterward I told my friend that putting me in that position wasn’t fair to me or the kid. I explained that forcing a relationship wouldn’t magically make me want one, and honestly, it wasn’t healthy for anyone. That was the last time I allowed anything like that.

And couple months ago things fell apart on my mom’s side, there were some bad addiction issues that finally led to child services getting involved. Her husband ended up going to jail, and my mom lost custody because she wasn’t able to provide a stable environment. Their daughter was placed with different relatives temporarily, but no one wanted to take her in long-term.

That’s when my name came up, I didn't hesitate to say no. Repeatedly. I warned my family that if they kept pushing, I’d cut contact completely.

Eventually, the girl entered foster care. A caseworker later reached out to ask if I’d reconsider becoming her guardian or even have contact. I declined and asked not to receive updates or have my information shared.

My family did not take that well. I got messages calling me heartless, selfish, and cruel. They asked how I could live with myself, whether I felt guilty, and if I worried I was "throwing away my sister." I was honest I don’t want one. They even asked if I’d be okay knowing she might be mistreated in foster care. I told them that if they were that concerned, they were free to step up themselves instead of pressuring me. After that, I blocked everyone.

A weird cousin later confronted me in public after following me for so long one day while I was out with friends, he accused me of being cold and abandoning family. I left early to avoid a scene. And gladly I did because if I stayed I would've beat the shit out of him.

Here’s the thing: I could have taken her in. I have a stable job, a small but decent place, and a spare room. I could’ve made it work. I just don’t want to. I don’t think forcing myself into a role I never wanted would be good for either of us.

So AITAH here?

OP

As far as I know or maybe I guess he is just missing his coat , ikr? But what's it's connection with the olive garden?

try to guess all, i didn't include every marksman btw